My own NYPD-badged secret psycho cyberstalker/stalker

This ad has only shown up three times over the years.  Usually too fast to be able to grab a screenshot.  There is simply no way this ad could be innocent.  Why would he brag about hacking Adwords?  For the same reason teenage psychopathic criminals film their rapes of school mates or beatings of homeless victims.  Psychopaths aren’t self referential (one of their arrested development traits), they need feedback from the outside world to assure themselves of the worth (or wickedness) of their deeds.  Plus what good is it to get over someone without letting them know.  Thus when he started giving an ex of mine tours of my apartment almost 20 years ago, he used to turn electronic devices on and off, it’s called gaslighting.  Solid proof to me, unbelievable to others (such as PAAs, police administrative assistants, who take complaints).  Often in gaslighting campaigns one isn’t really sure:  “Maybe I did leave those windshield wipers on”, etc.  But here components/devices were left on I hadn’t used in years.

The death threats started showing up during my NYPD FOIL application seeking details and source of a character assassination campaign against myself — I believe he is the source and his response supports that.  They’ve gone through various stages after I mentioned them in the same FOIL application, and in complaints to the CCRB, NYPD IAB, the AG’s office, in court filings and to an officer assigned to investigate the matter.  First the ads mostly featured guns and other weapons, then ‘dangerous looking’ flashlights (I’m not kidding, see below), then “Rest in Peace” ads, then ads featuring the words ‘dead’ or ‘kill’.  And every once in a while he brings old ones back.

 

This one was a ‘two-fer’, so are bodies.

The two ads above are curious.  For a while dry ads regarding Peyronie’s disease were showing up.  Then this one with the humorous graphics appeared.  What does it mean?  I don’t have Peyronie’s of course, I’m normal.  Oh wait, we are all normal to ourselves.  Maybe I should check.  Hey anybody have a Playboy and a Viagra?!  That’s the ticket!  This may be a serious matter however.  For framing purposes it helps to have distinguishing details such as birthmarks, moles, individual physical traits, etc.  There have already been a couple pick-up attempts by women I barely knew, within sight of their NYPD plainclothes handlers (I kid you not).  Will they be content with failure or will they cook up something?

(It should be noted that there was an extreme sexual charge between these ladies and their NYPD handlers.  So they were trying to please a lover.  They should sue the NYPD for rape.  Or advertise and make it a class action suit.  Of course at the time they wouldn’t have felt it was rape, but once slammed down for being of no use perhaps they changed their minds.  ‘Whatever it Takes’, ‘By any Means Necessary‘ are the mottos of psychopathic law enforcement units.  Sex means nothing more to them than taking an inflatable doll to bed or two people scratching each other behind their elbows simultaneously.  Of course I find it disquieting that by being friendly to me these ladies became prey for badged lizard Lotharios.

Psychopathic Don Juans are simply out of this world skillful, almost unbelievably so — emotional shapeshifters of quantum speed.  Perhaps they were coached by an Officer Eugene Depasse, if he is in fact an NYPD officer.  I was introduced to a Eugene Depasse (De Pas?) at a wedding between members of my ex’s therapy group (Nancy Becker, therapist) as I recall.  Also I was told privately that Gene had stated that he had come to therapy in order to stop living the womanizer life.  Ha, ha, ha.  Most likely, this psychopath was trying to understand his failures, join art to science, become an even more talented womanizer.  All psychopaths, no matter their intelligence, essentially live as strangers in a strange land, surrounded by others doing things for reasons they can’t understand.  So group therapy with normals could be very useful to them, but extremely dangerous to the normals.  Not being an insider I don’t know if Gene surreptitiously took over the group (as they often do places of work) but I believe Ms. Becker allowed him and probably other psychopathic clients to ruin the lives of clients.  I do have some memory of being told he was some kind of officer, perhaps it was NYPD.  The two NYPD Lotharios in question here, were one, a tall, 6′ 1″ or 2″ good looking Caucasian young man with solid brown hair, the other, a sort of roly poly individual in his forties, 5’ 8″to 10″ of Mediterranean complexion, both very arrogant.)

The appearance of this last ad was chilling.  It appeared on the evening of August 23, within an hour of my having bought an 4-pack of an identically packaged similar diet drink.  It would seem the murderous, psychopathic punk is stalking me.  I don’t understand why I can’t get protection from his Cape Fearing, cyber and otherwise.  This is a rogue, bad apple, criminal cop who should be arrested — for stalking, issuing death threats, trying to derail a FOIL and Art. 78 proceeding by same, investigated for possible attempted murder, and, though it may be hard to prove, for phone tapping and black bag entry for purposes of providing info/entertainment to an ex.

This one was even more chilling.  

It appeared the day after I had gone to a 24 hour flat fix joint late at night after finding a screw in my tire tread.  What does this ad mean?  That he was following/stalking me?  That he had placed that screw there (again) and was laughing at me because I couldn’t prove anything (https://pathwhisperer.info/2014/09/09/is-there-a-training-day-crew-in-the-nypd-and-are-they-targetting-me/)?  It has since appeared five or six more times.

Of course it’s another ‘two-fer’, he’s also calling me a slime.

For a brief period in May I was shadowed by a particular unmarked police car while dog walking.  Sometimes the occupant would even wave from close behind his illegally dark front window.  I could see his waving hand and arm, but nothing else of him.  He had parallel parked his car in a tight parking space.  I considered his action then, and consider it so now, to be a threat of imminent attack.  For awhile similar police cars also had illegally dark license plate covers in addition to the illegally dark front window, but the Village Voice’s Nick Pinto seems to have put an end to that. This car had plate number NYS EGR 6154, I believe, a smallish red Chevy, probably an Impala.  Perhaps this is my perp.

UPDATE, Oct. 9, 2017:  My mother and sister report that they have been receiving numerous hang up calls.  It should be noted that they no longer live at home due to a serious fire.

UPDATE, Oct. 25,2017:  He’s baaa-aaack!

This is a message from a psychopathic NYPD cop.  I don’t understand why I am not being protected from him.  Normal police officers, with normal human brains, you owe him no loyalty.  Psychopathic brains differ from ours.

If anyone in the NYPD, Internal Affairs, the Civilian Complaint Review Board, or the AG’s office is seeking to identity him, the closest I can come is Klaus Kinski’s photo below.  He had the same haircut, same color, the times I saw him from 1995 through spring, 2016, but with weirder eyes.  Do the equivalent of photo yearbooks exist?  Plus, do officers have to register non-NYPD supplied firearms?

This add showed up within days of my filing a second Freedom of Information Law (FOIL) request of the NYPD.  It’s obvious that he has something to hide (he followed similar timing before).  He should be arrested immediately for attempting to derail the FOIL process through threatening murder (which I personally believe he is quite capable of attempting).

[Private:  To the third party psychopath, why involve yourself?  What would it gain you?  Or was that you, ‘Klaus’, threatening an uninvolved individual?]

This is the insanity I live with — where do these ads come from and what do they mean?

Recently I went to an email account of mine and found this ad.

For years (over 10) I would see this same ad (or a similar one for the same website) on an auction website that I went to frequently.  I believe it now showed up in the email program to let me know it had been hacked (by a cop friend of my ex).  What good is getting over on somebody, if you can’t let them know?  Those who know how to do it can write scripts to send the metatags of their choice to advertising services.

This email website normally only has one series of ads.  Yet I also saw, one time only, a Charmin bathroom tissue ad (for around three seconds, literally).  I took this to mean that they had accessed my instrument/emergency supplies storage facility (no big deal).

Originally I thought the ad on the auction website was connected with firearms in the auctions.  However I never searched for any firearms and most were long guns anyway.  Furthermore this was the only firearm ad ever showing up.  I believe they wanted me to click on it, presumably to portray me as a violent individual.

However I have zero interest in concealed carry personally.  The only time I might wish to have a handgun would be if I lived on a farm or in bear country.  Other than that, I wouldn’t be interested in owning one.

For awhile now, I’ve prevented ads from appearing on my computer.  So I turned them back on and went to the same auction website.  Voila:

Screenshot from 2014-09-13

How am I supposed to take this?  Just more shenanigans from gas lighting psychopaths or something more sinister?

When the therapist husband (Steven Cope, http://www.stevencope.com/, http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/steven-cope-lcsw-new-york) of my ex’s therapist almost ran me down (as it appeared from my standpoint), he looked simply terrified and extremely angry.  I have no idea why.  I have no record of violence or violent threats.  I suspect one of the psychopathic cops is painting a false picture for his own purposes.  Or perhaps he, his wife  (Nancy Becker, http://nancybeckertherapy.com/, https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/name/Nancy_Becker_LCSW_New+York_New+York_145736), and her (their?) group therapy group are in the thrall of a psychopathic member of the group.

Now, there is a logical, nonviolent possible reason for their (my ex’s psychopathic police friends) believing these ads might be effective in drawing me in (I never clicked on one of them ever).  But that would involve repeated jail time felonies on their part.  I believe they used to give tours of my apartment to my ex, at the time I had a few gun magazines around.  I see these ads as proof of their illegal entry.

The NYPD knows who the main individual is through my communications.  I wish they would prove to themselves the psychopathic-or-not status of this individual, through Adrian Raines brain scans (https://pathwhisperer.wordpress.com/tag/adrian-raine/).

To the de Blasio administration, I hereby volunteer to identify NYPD whiteshirt psychopaths, gratis

Well not exactly gratis, I would request the freedom to publish the results of the brain scans, plus publishing a detailed study of select individuals (some of whom I already have in mind) including their brain scans, DNA sequences and facial images.

I think the study need be done only on whiteshirts and other rank-holding officers, due to the sheer numbers in the force. Though already of interest blue shirts should be considered. Basically however, psychopathic blueshirts will take their cue from what they observe. This is what lower level psychopaths have always done, they always know their place on the food chain (or speedily end up in jail).

Over the Bloomberg/Kelly years there were high profile news stories of rapes by psychopathic police officers. These officers simply interpreted the license given by the out of control and obviously unconstitutional (opinions of judges and lawyers not needed) stop-and-frisk policies as creating an open air prison. This led blueshirts who were psychopathic to feel they had the power to do whatever they wanted. They seemed to feel they were above the law (http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/nyc-crime/rapist-ex-nypd-asks-shorten-75-year-prison-term-article-1.1610805). Obviously this was not intended by Bloomberg and Kelly. But give psychopaths an inch, they’ll take a mile, every time.

I’m often found by such searches as “do psychopaths run in gangs.” Absolutely they do. You see it in every walk of life, including police forces. You see it in courts with psychopathic jurors siding with psychopathic defendants or collusion among psychopathic prosecuting attorneys, defense attorneys and judges to tilt the scales in favor of the psychopathic party (the Carl Andre and Lynn de Vecchio cases come to mind as possibilities, the Michael Pena jury above, the brass that pushed for Michael Oliver keeping his pension). The point of this paragraph is that concentrating on the white shirts should have a ripple effect upon the entire police force, making that smaller search sufficient. If desired of course I could handle the entire force, if paid.

I wish to state that I am not anti-police officer. I appreciate serious policing, both large and small, as much as anyone else. I will be forever grateful to a couple of anonymous officers who saved me and an associate from an almost certain violent mugging. I was having some shots taken for acting purposes. The photographer wanted to catch the soft late afternoon light with the East River in the background. Leaving the waterside park by a ramp to street level, we noticed a group of approaching hard eyed thirty-somethings silently communicating with a similar group behind us. Suddenly their predator like concentration ceased and their eyes focused far out in the field behind us, where a police blue and white was sitting. I have no doubt that the officers recognized exactly what was about to happen and were acting to prevent it. Without their presence we would had to have simultaneously acted completely oblivious about the situation and gotten through the advancing pincer using whatever force was necessary before the rear pincer closed on us. Once they both had we would almost certainly have been overpowered and ended up rolling on the ground in pain or knocked out. The photographer would have lost thousands of dollars of camera equipment and I would have lost a few thousand dollars of borrowed clothes and whatever money we had.

On the other side, I have sometimes bought and sold musical instruments, sometimes from trunks of cars and sometimes in toney neighborhoods. Occasionally residents called the police to have us checked out. If a cruiser came by slowly we’d step back to give a good view and wave or nod to the officer, who’d nod back. No problem.

I’m an activist but throwing molotov cocktails at law enforcement personnel (or anyone else obviously) as happened in the Ukraine recently is simply murder or attempted murder, absolutely criminal.

Finally I’m grateful to a local detective who gave me the phone number and name in connection with a harassing calls complaint. I spoke to the individual, he claimed that he had made the calls in trying to fax material to a local newspaper. I don’t believe that was the situation. I am sure that the calls came from an ex of mine. For years she’d call me up with fax polling calls, both at home and at work. She also always knew where I worked and what shift. This detective helped on a couple related phone harassments. I also asked him if the precinct was investigating me for some reason (as opposed to my ex harassing me through her cop friends and their police powers). He said no.

This introduces my personal log in this fire. Some years ago a psychopathic officer stopped his car to ask me some question he clearly didn’t care about, around 2 or 3 in the morning. I was in the habit of walking home from the World Financial Center after midnight, some 8 miles or so, a few times a week – I had a lot to think about, I had gone through a rough breakup and my ex had been ‘befriended’ by a group of psychopathic police officers. It seemed this was his way of letting me know he was one of them. Somehow I immediately recognized him as both a cop and a psychopath (probably by his arrogance) and said, if I recall correctly, ‘you’re whorehouse is a block behind us and your precinct house’s about three blocks over’. I had seen unmarked police cars ferrying prostitutes back and forth some four, five times. Every precinct has both a brothel and a station house (http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/jaynie-mae-baker-plead-guilty-soccer-mom-madam-case-sources-article-1.1136172, https://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/jaynie-mae-baker-plead-guilty-soccer-mom-madam-case-sources-article-1.1136172). There are both bad apple cops and bad apple precincts.

Years later this same officer, by then a white shirt I believe, was parked outside my building for a couple hours with this ex, on the night of my birthday. They obviously knew my schedule, as they were waiting for me when I got home from work around 1 am.  They must have worried that I might flip out, because they had a blue and white Explorer parked at a nearby fire hydrant, it’s interior lights on, the three officers looking totally miserable.

What they were doing for a couple hours right outside my building on my birthday I don’t know. But I would like to know if there was soundtrack playing and exactly what it was and exactly how they got it.

Shortly after our breakup, this ex had approached me in the local post office and apologized for her behavior, saying that sometimes “she got maniacal.” This was putting it mildly, as far as I was concerned it was as though she had been taken over by aliens. I no longer even recognized the person looking out of her eyes. I had never experienced anything like it. Suddenly it was ‘who are you and why are you bothering me?’ from someone whom I could no longer recognize, who I thought I knew as well as the back of my hand.

Lost in Space’s Will Robinson to his father who, having been taken over by an alien, was about to throw Will to his death, ‘Dad, it’s me Will. Your son. You just gotta remember, you just gotta remember.’

Dorothy O. Lewis, from M. Gladwell’s The New Yorker article, Crime and Science – DAMAGED (http://www.newyorker.com/archive/1997/02/24/1997_02_24_132_TNY_CARDS_000377330): “Lewis recalls, “I was testifying, and I looked down at the defense table and David wasn’t there. You know, David is a sweetie. He has a softness and a lovable quality. Instead, seated in his place there was this glowering kind of character, and I interrupted myself. I said, ‘Excuse me, Your Honor, I just wanted to call to your attention that that is not David.’ Everyone just looked.” In the end, the judge vacated Wilson’s death sentence.” http://gladwell.com/damaged/

Narcissists live by the rule ‘baby feels no pain’, everybody else is expendable. Like psychopaths others can be written out of their lives as seemingly easily as turning a page.

Sadly that encounter in the post office was the last time I ever saw that person as I had known her. Though I do think she came forward occasionally. For a while she called my answering machine machine 15 to 20 times a day. It had to be her because after reporting this to the police it stopped immediately, obviously they had tipped her off. Also she’d make fax polling calls, for years, to both home and work numbers of mine (even through job and shift changes). A few times I received touch tone calls of SOS dots and dashes.

She was in therapy the whole time I knew her, three private sessions a week plus group therapy. She also said she had spent time in mental hospitals, though I never knew why. Her therapist (Nancy Becker, http://nancybeckertherapy.com/, https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/name/Nancy_Becker_LCSW_New+York_New+York_145736) should have hospitalized her at the point of her dissociation above (‘going maniacal’).  Also she once told me that there was a voice in the back of her head that was always belittling her and telling her that her hopes and aspirations would never work out — it seems this personality took over. Instead the therapist allowed psychopaths in group therapy to manipulate her and then pass her on to manipulating psychopaths in the local precinct. That psychopaths were allowed into group therapy with non-psychopaths is incompetent to the point of criminality (its like throwing piranhas in with goldfish), her clients should sue her for malpractice and she should lose he license.

Sadly, strangely, and, in fact, down right bizarrely this is not just ancient history. Not long ago, the therapist’s husband (Steven Cope, http://www.stevencope.com/, http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/steven-cope-lcsw-new-york), himself a therapist, lunged his car (containing also his son) from a standing start to where I was crossing in the parking lane. If I had tripped it would have been murder, as I see and saw it at the time. I was just walking by and he floors the car from some twenty feet away, forcing me to leap or be killed (not being in his head I can not state as to certainty his intention, only my own experience and viewpoint, perhaps he never saw me, though I doubt it). As I made the sidewalk and spun towards the car I recognized him and saw his face frozen in fear and hate. I have no explanation whatsoever. I had not interacted with him in years and years (the last time I spoke to him would have been in 1993-94). Somehow it seems someone is scaring them in regards to myself, I suspect it’s the psychopathic white shirt mentioned above. Its called character assassination.  A tell of a psychopathic character assassination is that often the target is kept unaware of the substance of the calumny.  That way the target experiences an insidious hollowing out of the ground under their feet and cannot respond legally or any other way to slander and pathological lying.  If the target has to be kept from knowing the lies it is also of course probable that lying is going on, but somehow they get away with it.  (More: https://pathwhisperer.wordpress.com/2012/03/11/from-country-of-liars-character-assassination/.)

I’ve had no interactions with my ex either. I haven’t spoken to her since being in mediation with her, years and years and years ago. After her ‘sometimes I go maniacal’ I was distraught and went half crazy trying to figure out why an individual would chose narcissism (all non biological emotional disturbances are choices, though on a deep soul level). So when I ran into her I’d try to reach the non-maniac. They were extremely brief conversations, she’d quickly walk away, this took place maybe 4 or so times, totally unpredictably. I was very careful not to cross any line to harassment or stalking so there was no cause to take me to court.  Since it was rare and unpredictable they had to serve me the papers at home, they knew my schedule. I stopped trying to reach her after the mediation and, keeping a verbal promise in that session, I never spoke to her again. Actually I don’t believe I even know what she looks like anymore. It seems she had plastic surgery.

Years and years ago my wife and I were eating in a local restaurant. After we were seated I noticed my ex’s therapy group. I had met them all at a wedding of two of their members years earlier. I looked but I did not see my ex. But I did notice a leering psychopath who kept grinning at me. Later that night, around 3 or 4 am, two fax polling calls came in. When I traced the number it was my ex’s. I recall once having told her that I hoped she would never wake up in the middle of night saying ‘oh my god, what have I done.’

To my knowledge I hadn’t seen her for good amount of time since even before this dinner. I should have seen her 2-3 times a year coming and going from her nearby therapy, as I did in the past. However I have occasionally seen someone vaguely familiar staring at me, sometimes in the company of the same leering psychopath at the dinner. I did see unmarked police cars, it seems, regularly parked outside her therapist’s on the main thoroughfare of this area. I’ve walked by that street crossing hundreds of times over the years in the normal course of events.  I own a property south of it and live north of the street. I came to suspect these cars were the psycho captain’s or his crew’s (I don’t know his actual rank or name.  I’m sure I could pay a private detective to find that information.  However they would probably find that out, and freak out even more). I remember thinking, ‘Is this for real? So this means this is her therapy time?’ This brings up the question, how much taxpayer money, over the years, did he dedicate to ‘protecting’ her from absolutely nothing at all?

I would also sometimes see these same cars parked on my block, they seemed to know my schedule, or they would go slowly by if I were sitting at a sidewalk cafe, or follow me down the street about a block behind at walking pace. If I documented suspected harassment, fireworks could ensue. They seemed to take this as a hostile act, once auxiliary cops were posted on my corner for days and regular cops at the therapist’s corner (the building’s entrance is on a sidestreet that I rarely am on). They were all very hostile, a cop at the therapist’s corner actually unlatched his holster while glaring right at me.  This is insane.  Also I would never see the cars involved in the neighborhood again.

Years had gone by before that dinner. My life had gone on. I had gotten married and I married for love. First I had to fall out of love with my ex (though obviously she owns a piece of my soul). I finally had to accept that dissociation and narcissism were choices. And that I would never reach that person who’d send me the touch tone SOSs. This isn’t as weird as it sounds, narcissists are normal human beings with souls and soul deep emotions and needs, sometimes the soul will come forward and ‘possess’ the individual. This is true for every narcissist I have ever known, and I grew up with them. It doesn’t mean much however, it’s always temporary.

Not only that but I had broken free from a romantic yoke that had enslaved me for decades. I had spent some twenty years pursuing narcissists, trying to persuade them to come in from the cold. I was never remotely successful. Usually they were incest victims, sometimes also bisexuals who hated any man who turned them on, sometimes also prostitutes (which was something I could never recognize), sometimes all three. I had some kind of radar that enabled me to find them, and, sadly, I’d leave a ‘happy home’ for the chance. A little violin music please. In the end, I had a dream in which I was saying goodbye to a woman and just crying and crying. Great gulping cries like a little child. Not wanting to cry anymore I ripped myself awake and thereafter found myself free to fall in love as my soul desired. Its unfortunate that I hadn’t had that dream/gone through those soul changes twenty years earlier – a home in the suburbs, . . . etc., etc.

Both of these steps required a couple years and we were engaged for a further 2 years or so. So by the time of that dinner she and I were old history to me. If she had gotten plastic surgery as safety from me then that was deeply pathological. So pathological that her therapist couple should again have hospitalized her. Particularly since I believe she had a young child by then. Young children can psychologically detach from a parent disfigured in an accident, let alone one disfigured by choice.

From the standpoint of her narcissistic personality construct, plastic surgery driven by hysteric fear made a certain kind of sense. She once told me that she understood the thinking of a narcissistic relative of mine, that she had used to think like that. She essentially described an exhausting ‘Dutch boy at the dike’ thinking pattern with reality forever trying to make it through to the narcissist, past the narcissist’s eternal vigilance. This is why Scott Peck, in his book, The People of the Lie, describes narcissistic thinking as unfollowable loops and loop de loops (paraphrasing).  They can tell five contradictory lies in one sentence and believe them all. He also describes them as having ghastly elderly years, as the flesh weakens, so does the will — the truths of the frustrated soul then bear in on the narcissist. All narcissists hate dreaming for the same reason, dreams are the realm of the soul, not the will. Scott Peck writes that narcissists are addicted to the will, I prefer to say that they only accept the will as being of themselves, emotions are a manipulation from outside the self. In severe cases love itself is the challenge that must not go unanswered, the red cape the bull must answer. Fear and hysteria would have helped her maintain her narcissistic reality. It was something that would strengthen the ‘Dutch boy’ at his desperate task.

It would back up her will, as it were. It seems Cap’n Psycho was more than willing to oblige. Would a psychopath spend years and years keeping a vulnerable person on the knife edge of insanity? Sure. Without normal drives and aspirations but normal intelligence (or greater than normal) they need to find ways to occupy themselves. Ways that feed their self-perceived superiority. I’ve known psychopaths to run gaslighting or character assassination campaigns for years.

Further Cap’n Psycho needs to hide his own criminal acts. This is a horse he can’t get off of. The first act of ‘harassment by cop’ of me could have ended his career. Now, years and years and years later, he’s facing serious time as well as an end to his career. At one time I feared he and his psycho crew (they are really sick, complete psychopaths who shouldn’t be allowed to mingle with society) might murder my ex to protect themselves, but now the circle of knowledge has spread way too far. Is he trying to incite someone to kill me? The therapist husband’s driving was attempted murder.

At various times I have tried to bring this to the attention of superior law enforcement, but not successfully. The Civilian Complaint Review Board of the time and Internal Affairs wanted a level of proof I could not possibly have provided. ‘Sure, give me police investigative powers and the power of subpoena and I’ll come back with a proven case.’ That’s impossible. I even contacted the FBI. A couple times I also approached the DA’s office. But of course they depend on the police to build their cases. The last thing they want to do is investigate and prosecute policeman unless massively forced to. It’s a built-in conflict of interest. I did try very hard however. I went down to the DA’s office, filled out complaint forms, argued and argued, etc. All to no avail. There needs to an independent prosecutors office dedicated to police misbehavior. Otherwise psychopathic officers will and do run riot.

I was talking to an attorney not long ago. He said my story (and it was only a sliver of the story) didn’t make any sense to him, “individuals become police officers to serve and protect.” Really now. Isn’t that nice, the universe is dependent on what makes sense to us or not? What I have gone through doesn’t make any sense to me, do I get to ignore it?

Back to narcissism, I once witnessed half of a conversation between a narcissistic relative and an old friend dying of cancer. After the call, my relative said that he/she would probably never talk to that person again, that they had never really been friends anyway. I knew this was a lie. I believe I know exactly what took place in my relative’s mind. First, vast mourning at the prospect of losing a long and close friend. Then panic at the reminder of his/her own mortality. At that point, the narcissistic construct came forward, ‘I can save you, do you want me to?’ ‘Yes, yes.’ ‘No problem, that dying person was no friend, you have no, and never had any, feelings for that dying person, ever.’ ‘Yes, of course, what was the dying persons name again? Thank you, thank you.’ Baby feels no pain — that’s the narcissist’s mantra.

If one can redefine emotions on the fly, think what a ‘get out of jail free card’ that would be. For extreme narcissists, love can be hate, hate can be love. Their will dictates what emotion the mind should feel (and, though I haven’t mentioned it, a belief in their own sheer, unblemished perfectness — these people think they have never made a mistake in their lives). But this ability comes at huge price. They give up a lived life. Narcissists can never truly attach to or love another. They can’t even ever know anyone on a soul level. This includes a spouse, siblings or their own child. Their false construct needs the freedom to cut free any source of unhappiness at any time. The will must always be able to conquer the emotions. Assuming my ex did have plastic surgery, in a sense it was to kill that part of her that still loved me.

However narcissists do have souls, they do have soul deep needs and emotions, thus they open themselves to narcissistic catastrophe. It’s truly one of the ghastliest things to witness in the psychological world. Personality destruction is simply the start.

My father was told as a little boy that Quakers don’t get angry. It’s insane saying that to a two year old. I think he and his siblings must have decided that their parents loved them, but just didn’t love their emotions which they split off from — but you are your emotions. I had the misfortune as a child of attending the division of property among them after my grandmother passed away. It was as though the baby spiders had all returned to the home web, desperate to find the love owed to them by birthright. ‘Where’s the love that’s just mine, it’s got to be here somewhere. Mine, mine, mine.’ It was a totally loveless family. My father had a terrible, lingering death bed – and not once did he talk to anyone, or wish to, of the family he was born into. It’s worth noting that monster families normally last generations.

I have other relatives who have never had an emotion off the grayscale, let alone pastels, let alone living color, and who hate anyone with more lifeforce than that of an amoeba. Narcissism is an aggressive emotional illness, they are terribly threatened by non-narcissists. They are not content to sit in a corner and be narcissistic by themselves. I think my ex’s downhill slide started with her narcissistic therapist pushing her to reestablish ties with her psychopathic mother (she had cut all contact, moved with no forwarding address, etc.). We wondered why she was doing this. My ex even said that it seemed over the line for a therapist. The reason is very simple. Her insane narcissistic therapist couldn’t stand to see her escape to a lived life.

There’s actually nothing strange about an individual seeking out a therapist with their own defect or the defect of a parent. They would feel right at home. It is very sad however.

As you may or may not have noticed, I’ve divided time into ‘years’, ‘years and years’, ‘years and years and years’. If I told you the actual number of years you wouldn’t believe me, you’d say it was crazy. It is crazy, it’s psychopath crazy. I might have a Guinness world record for duration of police harassment or harassment by an ex through the police. Now there’s a question, who’s the master manipulator here, Cap’n Psycho, or my ex who used the police to harass, monitor, spy on my. I think I’d settle for 2-3 million a year for character assassination, emotional stress and torture, invasion of privacy, impact on my career/employment/earnings, etc.

Wow . . . that’d be quite a bit. I’d put together a country western band, buy an old Winnebago, paint my picture on the side, hit the road – PW and the Lonesome Sombreros. I don’t understand young people, if there’s no slide guitar it ain’t country. I was down at a local country bar one night, there were more people in the band than in the whole bar, we were doing “Help Me Make it Through the Night”, one couple was on the dance floor. After we finished, the male of the couple came up to me, shook my hand saying. “Thanks so much. You don’t know, but you just saved my marriage, Thank you, thank you.” Obviously they had been fighting and made up during the song. I remember thinking, “Wow, just wow. This is why I am what I am. This is why I do what I do. All those years in acting school, worth it. No soul deadening 9 to 5 job for me. . . . Oh, wait, I work 9 to 5. . . . this is just a hobby. Oh yeah, a hobby . . . .” Oh well. When I started singing publicly I used to give free performances at old folks homes. I wouldn’t say I was inflicting myself on them but I was less than professionally consistent. I was at this one home once presenting American standards with a pianist. We were doing “Autumn Leaves.” In the front one elderly lady was singing along with her eyes closed, tears streaming down her face, she looked simultaneously extremely sad and extremely happy. Obviously while the song lasted she was once again with a departed love.

Of course, the NYPD could actually filter out the psychopaths without me.  In fact, very easily.  In addition, they might not desire the trauma on the department of my system.  I believe ‘making examples of misbehaving psychopaths’ is actually extremely important in reaching witness psychopaths.  As frozen children, psychopaths have a great deal of difficulty in recognizing consequences.  A public display would concentrate their minds.  However, the NYPD probably would not want to be associated with any psychopathy study.

Here’s how they could do the same thing very quietly.  They could announce that in three months time, once the procedure is worked out, that everyone will be tested for psychopathic brain structures.  The vast majority of psychopaths would simply leave.  Butter wouldn’t melt in the departing psychopaths’ mouths.  They’d have the best of reasons for leaving and evince no concern or stress.

Unfortunately the NYPD would still have to go through the scans (I would suggest following Adrian Raine’s procedures), even though they’d catch very few.  If not, the psychopaths would have recognized the ruse, psychopaths read the truth nonverbally, they would have recognized what was going on.

I would hope and assume that the NYPD would want to clear its ranks of psychopathic officers.

Related posts to this:  https://pathwhisperer.wordpress.com/2012/01/09/for-the-record-private-message-transmitted-publicly/; https://pathwhisperer.wordpress.com/2012/03/11/from-country-of-liars-character-assassination/; https://pathwhisperer.wordpress.com/2011/06/05/search-are-narcissists-attracted-to-sociopaths/

For the record (private message transmitted publicly)

This is not an informational post.  I wish to cover certain events publicly for the record.

In this blog I have occasionally discussed a therapist who I consider to be mentally ill, to be a rigid narcissist (one of Scott Peck’s mentally ill evil of his book ‘People of the Lie’).  I had an old friend who had four sessions a week with this therapist (let’s call her Nancy) (Nancy Becker, LCSW, http://nancybeckertherapy.com/, https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/name/Nancy_Becker_LCSW_New+York_New+York_145736) including group therapy.  Any group therapy run by a therapist with a denied personality defect will become something of a cult in celebration of that defect.  This defect also lead her to admit psychopaths to the group.  “Treating” psychopaths in group therapy with non-psychopaths is like throwing a piranha into a goldfish bowl.  For this I believe she should lose her license and her normal clients should consider suing her for malpractice.  Furthermore this therapist came from a therapy cult background, the Sullivanian Fourth Wall theater as I recall.

Anyway the practice is in my neighborhood.  In the normal course of a week I will walk by their building 3-4 times (it’s on Broadway).  I  never interact with them in any way.  I haven’t seen my old friend (an ex) in many years.  However there seems to be something terribly wrong now.

A couple days ago I ran into a senior associate of this therapy group in a grocery store, actually her husband, let’s call him Steve (Steven Cope, LCSW, http://www.stevencope.com/, http://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/steven-cope-lcsw-new-york), who is a therapist himself.  He seemed considerably agitated, even fearful, at this meeting, which is bizarre.  I have also noticed that the group’s “circle” has been reacting to me bizarrely.  Perhaps it springs from an event of some months ago.

On that occasion, I was walking some twenty blocks downtown to do some shopping.  I absently noticed that I ran into a particular individual 3 or 4 times on the trip downtown.  When on the trip back uptown I kept running into him again, I realized he was following me.  If I looked at him he would suddenly turn to a crosswalk or go into a store.  But then he’d be back again.  I also realized that he had a confederate shadowing us on the other side of the street.

There was nothing professional about them.  The one near me had sort of a long nose, pointy face, strange eyes and an extreme arrogance of attitude.  I considered him to be an immediately obvious psychopath.  The other seemed like a normal young guy, brown haired, with a beard (I think).

When we were back uptown within a block or so of the therapist’s location I stopped and confronted him silently.  They disappeared when I took out a camera phone.  At that point I then took a picture of a car nearby that I knew was affiliated with the group in case the car had been used by them to jumpfrog my position during my shopping expedition.  I had previously seen the car parked on my block on days I had scheduled comings and goings, going by slowly when I ate at outdoor cafes, shadowing me at walking pace a block, block and a half back as I walked, etc.

The above is the whole event (though I did run into the psychopath in a totally different part of town that I regularly visit a week or so later).  Afterwards, I also began noticing that their “circle” in their immediate neighborhood responded to my presence completely out of proportion.

So my conclusion is that these two were therapy group members of this therapist.  I don’t know what the psychopath had to say to others, but it is a cause for worry.  I wish to turn down the volume, there is absolutely nothing going on here, absolutely no reason for anyone to be fearful of me.  The above account is the sum total, but psychopaths will tell any lie they can get away with and I don’t know what these two claimed.  I’m totally guessing, I just don’t know.  I have no idea why Steve was agitated at my presence.

Also angry psychotic level narcissists can be extremely dangerous.  I don’t want any further developments.

One of the reasons I took up writing this blog was to hold up a big ‘BACK OFF’ sign to petty psychopathic harassment.  It doesn’t seem to be working.